A New Year, The Most Beautiful You: SOULutions


From the time I was little my mom would always say to me, “It’s what is on the inside that counts.” While I have always known this to be true, the older I get, the more I really understand this. Looks fade: the wrinkles increase, skin gets loose, hips widen and hair thins… oh my, isn’t it fun to get older! And while no one is claiming that those things are actually fun, there is still “fun” to be had. It all depends on perspective and values.

I am not going to pretend I am above letting those superficial things bother me because, of course, they do! However, it is how much they bother that really concern me. When I find that I get TOO caught up with superficial things like being “skinny” or having the right bag then it is time to refocus my priorities. For example, we all want to be thin, but my focus has turned to being “healthy” and not a particular size. The ironic part is that by doing this I have actually lost a little weight (not that it matters- wink wink).

I also struggle with my love for “pretty things.” As a stylist and fashion lover I covet many of the “it” items out there. Yet, I don’t have a never-ending fashion allowance, so buying every hot item to hit the runway is not going to happen. Besides, even if I could, would that make me happier? Not likely. So I remind myself that “things” don’t bring true happiness; people and relationships do. Yes, I know it sounds ridiculous to state something so obvious, but it is easy to lose sight of this at times despite the fact that we have all heard a million times that “money doesn’t buy happiness.”  It makes life easier; no one is denying that, but true happiness it will not bring.

So I might be going out on a limb here but I have a feeling that we all have our “issues,” those things that matter to us, but we wish they didn’t. We all have those things that make us feel inadequate and insecure. And, life – oh it can be mean! And people even meaner, even the people we call friends can let us down. I have noticed that amongst some moms gossip runs rampant. It is poisonous.

I often remind myself that “hurt people, hurt people.” It was something I heard in high school and it has always stuck with me. As a very sensitive person that little phrase has helped me deal with negative comments. Those who say nasty things do not feel good about themselves. While those comments may still hurt, it is easier to move on and forgive with the right perspective and focus.

And this leads me back to where I started. I want to start my new year with a renewed focus on the things that truly matter. Of course being a good mom, wife, friend, daughter are huge priority. Yet I cannot be the best person I can be for those important people if I am not fulfilled myself. Happiness starts with each of us and it is crucial we do things that will nourish our mind, body and spirit.

This is why I have created what I call my 5 SOULutions for 2015.

1. More breathing:

This is not a new goal for me, as I have reached the place in my life before where I realized that I would go a whole day without taking in a good, fill up my lungs deep breath. While yoga is a guaranteed way to make sure that your body gets the cleansing oxygen it needs, attending a class daily is not realistic. However, deep-cleansing breaths can happen anywhere, anytime. In the car, while taking a shower or right now as you read this. I have taken several deep breaths as I write this and instantly feel a bit calmer. I am also inspired to try some meditation.  I found this app that I can download on to my iPhone that will help me in doing so. I like that I can pick the amount of time and it was created for beginners.

2. More baths:

My relationship with baths has gone in waves. There have been times where I would take a lot of baths (mainly before kids), and then there have been times where it might happen once over a 6 month time period. This year, I have decided to change that. A couple weeks ago after my husband returned from our date night on the earlier side (because I am a boring pregnant person) I decided to take a bath. It hasn’t happened since we moved into our new house 6 months ago. So, this could not be just any bath, it had to be special. I went all out for little old me. Roses, my favorite candle, bath oil and a refreshing snack of oranges slices. I ended up sitting in the bath for almost an hour, hesitant to drag my cozy self out of the tub. I did so because I looked like a prune but more so I was worried I would fall asleep. Yet, I told myself this whole bath thing would happen again soon. It was the perfect way to unwind… the only thing missing… a glass of wine! To be added in about 6 months.


3. More water:

I do not drink enough water, and in case I forget this fact my husband so kindly reminds me on almost a daily basis of this. It is just plain silly that sometimes I will get through most of my day before I realize that I haven’t had any water since after my morning workout. Not healthy! So I am determined to change this in 2015. One way I plan to combat this is by filling my glass bottle of water with not only water, but a lemon or orange slice as well. It tastes so delicious and refreshing that I hope I am less likely to forget. Not to mention water out of glass bottle tastes far superior than water out of a plastic bottle. For more on the beauty and health benefits of water click here.

vase // candle // bath oil // water filter // water bottle

4. More informed:

When you have young children finding time to watch the news or read a newspaper is nearly impossible. In my dream world, each morning I would sip my latte and leisurely read The Wall Street Journal, while my toddler played peacefully with puzzles but like I said, “dream world.” While she may play with a puzzle for 12.5 seconds, she is quickly on to something more destructive or dangerous. So, unless you are some sort of a genius that can scan the newspaper at record speed then you are likely having trouble staying current on what is happening in our world on a daily basis. Not to mention, when I have thrown on the morning news it is a one-way ticket to bummer town and frankly not the way I want to start the day.

Yet, thanks to an email newsletter service named theSkimm I can quickly stay informed of the important current events. I encourage every mom (or busy woman) to subscribe to this genius site where you will receive an email each day that will have you up-to-date in minutes. Plus, it is funny! The sarcastic humor will even give you a morning chuckle rather than a cry (yours or your child’s).

5. More understanding:

All right, I saved the hardest for last. A big goal for me this year is to be less judgmental. I think it is in human nature to judge other people and quickly form an opinion of their choices. Well, I really don’t like that I do this and what I don’t like even more is that sometimes I will share this opinion with other people (yes, this is gossip). So, this year I am going to try very, very, very hard to turn judgment to understanding. I am hopeful this change in perspective will help me in achieving this goal. After all, who am I to judge?? And not to get all preachy, since I try to leave religion out of it, but there really is only One Being that can do this. The rest of us? Well, half the time we are just trying to survive and smile, right??

So there you have it, my “SOULutions.” Not sure I will perfect any of these but just by writing them down I have stated my intentions and that is better off than I was a week ago. I encourage all of you to do the same and if you feel so inclined please sure with the MOMMY CHIC community or me. Together, we can help each other to be the best mommies and people we can be, beautiful inside and out!

Watch out for the joy-stealers: gossip, criticism, complaining, faultfinding, and a negative, judgmental attitude. – Joyce Meyer

with love,

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